I had just moved into my first apartment with friends after college, trying to make a go of it as an “adult” in New York City. I was busy navigating the city I grew up in from an entirely new perspective, with a job that had me on the road more than in the office. Living out of a suitcase has some perks for an early-20 something, but providing time for personal inquiry, reflection, and growth definitely wasn’t one of them. I wasn’t present or mindful in my day to day experiences, and I was too busy to even notice– or care.
Then, it happened: My parents told me they were ending their marriage of 27 years. My life changed in an instant, and suddenly nothing was the same. I learned the hard way that my sense of self and identity were inexplicably linked to my cohesive family unit. And once that was gone, so was any understanding of who I was or what mattered to me. I felt like I was drowning in a sea of self-doubt and unknowns. I had no idea how to move forward, let alone make it to the other side of this massive change intact.
Friends and family gave me endless advice, yet none of it really rang true. I greatly appreciated hearing all the ways other people dealt with divorce or their own bout with intense change, but none of it really helped as much as I’d hoped. I decided that it was up to me to find something – anything, really – to rediscover who I was and find a way forward. I knew it was time to turn inwards and embark on a personal growth journey to find the answers, and I’m so glad I did.
I began by starting a meditation practice and signing up for a yoga teacher training. And this is when everything shifted.
It was a cold, dreary Friday night in January. I was huddled up on the floor in one of the first weeks of training, exhausted. It had been a long week at work, and the bulk of my three hour yoga philosophy class was still ahead of me. My attention was starting to wane, but in an instant I was alert. I’ll never forget the jolt of electricity that ran through me the moment I heard my teacher say that “we are not our minds”.
I felt it physically before I processed it mentally. A surge of heat rushed down my body from the crown of my head to the tip of my toes, butterflies erupted in my stomach, and a slow, wide grin spread across my face. My mind started to race as I understood that it is possible to rise above the chatter within, separate ourselves from our thoughts, and take back control over our minds and our lives. Pure joy surged through my body. I felt relieved.
This marked a profound shift in how I viewed my life: It’s not the events itself that matter– it’s our thoughts that hold value. Our perception of what happens has all the power. I suddenly realized that if I focused on my thoughts and overall mindset, then my circumstances could and would change.
This seemingly simple yet profound shift in perspective inspired me to learn as much about the mind as I could, which ultimately led me to get a Masters Degree in Clinical Psychology and Education with a concentration in Mind Body Practice and a Coaching emphasis. I felt called to understand the mind from as many disciplines as possible – especially psychology, the most widely recognized and in many ways respected modalities.
Time and time again, both my personal experiences, varied trainings and Master’s degree have all taught me that great power lies in our perspective. That opportunity does exist within change, but you have be in the right mindset to see it.
Practicing mindfulness and actively shifting the way I think about things allowed me to stop feeling like the victim of what happens to me and step out as the leader of my life — a life I consciously create for me.
Take graduate school, for example. No one really understood why I wanted to turn down a promotion and leave a coveted, full-time marketing position at a very well-known start up. To get a degree that had no guarantees when it came to financial success or a job down the line, no less. But I just knew that if I stayed in my current job, I wouldn’t be able to fulfill my potential. To make a difference, and leave a mark on the world. I knew I was capable of more.
And if I hadn’t taken that leap and embraced change, then I wouldn’t be where I am today.
When I let go of my victimhood and leaned into all the ways I could leverage the benefits of change, I reclaimed my confidence amidst the unknown and took back control over my life.
Today, it’s my mission to empower my clients to get their confidence back and optimize the way they navigate change through the development of self-awareness, emotional stability, resilience, and new perspectives. All so they can continue to achieve, grow, and be the best version of themselves possible. Within that, I help them to understand that it’s not what happens to us that matters. The way we see things is where the value lies.
I’m passionate about this work because it speaks to my heart. I’ve been in your shoes, and I know your pain and frustration. Your deep desire to be unfazed by change and respond to outside circumstances rather than react. But I also know what it feels like to overcome it all. To finally feel like “you’ve got this” rather than “everything is falling apart”. And I’m dedicated to helping others discover that they can do the same.
The life of your dreams isn’t out of reach.